“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”
Many people interpret this passage to imply that you cannot properly give an offering to God when you are alienated from one of His children. While that is accurate, in context, it means much more than that.
These verses highlight the requirement of loving your neighbor. It is mentioned while Jesus is teaching on the commandment not to kill. He adds that even those who are angry with their brother are in "danger of judgement”. He then elevates the importance of reconciliation by saying, no matter what you're doing, even if you’re worshipping... if you remember an offence, stop and go fix it.
People say that "time heals all wounds", but that is not true. Time doesn’t heal all wounds; in fact, it deepens some . Small disagreements, left untreated, become huge divides. I know of situations where people literally don't remember the original issue, but since it was never addressed, their relationship remains broken.
Anger and bitterness need nothing but darkness to grow. Like an untreated disease they silently destroy their host. The tragedy is that if dealt with quickly, most grudges could be easily fixed. The great composer William Walton said, “A grudge is like being stung to death by one bee.” It’s needless. If we let pride stop us from dealing with an offence, eventually it will be fatal to the relationship and damaging to our walk with God. In this passage, Jesus includes grudges in a discussion of anger and murder. That indicates that passive hostility is not a small issue to God.
No matter what you're doing, if you are alienated from someone, go deal with it. If God brings it to your mind... go do what you can to fix it. Nothing is more heartbreaking than the realization that you have wasted years being too prideful to go to a friend or family member and show them that you love them too much to be apart from them.
Whatever it takes.... do it now.
"Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness... Laugh when you can. Apologize when you should. And forgive what you can't change."
- Anonymous
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