" Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ."
Great instructions on how to become the body of Christ, unless you start using only parts of the verse. When not used in it's entirety, this verse can offer us license, and provide cover for our agendas. Partial adherence can lead to either speaking the truth with no love, or not speaking the truth and using love as an excuse.
Typically there are three camps:
1. Those who can't wait to point out their brothers mistakes. This group will ignore the love requirement and are more than willing to "speak the truth" and claim this verse as license to judge
2. Those whose only goal is popularity and peace for themselves... When there is a truth that their brother needs to hear, they abdicate that responsibility in the name of "only speaking love".
3. Those who love their friends enough to tell them the truth.
In reality.....If you don't love your friend more than your friendship - then you really don't have either one. You have to care so much about another person that offending them is preferable to not helping them.
If the people around you don't know your weaknesses...if they can't provide accountability. If they never challenge you, or sharpen you - then those people are acquaintances not friends.
If there is a person around you who loves you enough to tell you the truth even when you don't want to hear it. If they encourage you, and push you to be your best. Then that person is a friend and is exceedingly rare and incredibly valuable.
Real Friendship is not for sissy's...you have to be willing to speak and hear the truth...neither of which is easy.
The best way to find a good friend - is to be one. This week, talk about stuff that matters with those you love. Try a little transparency and depth....Most important, don't let either requirement in this verse slip through the cracks. ..."Speak the Truth...and speak it in Love."
"Rare as is true love, true friendship is rarer."
Jean de La Fontaine
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